Civility is Always Welcome

A handful of you have expressed that what I am doing with this blog is being judgmental and trying to police other people's lives...LOL. The only people who believe that are the ones who are guilty of the dysfunctions I discuss. Yes, the ones who have had their toes stepped on by truth, but still refuse to hold themselves accountable. Some of you misguided individuals need schooling and I have been chosen to do it. Calling out negative behaviors in order for people to improve themselves and grow spiritually is NOT being judgmental. I am not policing anyone's life nor do I have a desire to do so. Everything I talk about is based on personal experiences and/or direct observations. I pray that no one else has the audacity to form their mouth to speak such ignorance. This blog is my small contribution in an attempt to make the world a better place. With that being said, let's talk!

Have you ever been in situations where one or more individuals who acted badly towards you, unprovoked, during an extended time, suddenly, started treating you better? Were you receptive and welcoming to their behavior or did you reject their sudden onset of civility? What about those who take you back and forth with their changeable behaviors like a ping-pong ball? Some people's attitudes change more frequently than the weather! Should they be permanently dismissed or should you simply swing back and forth with them? Examples of this situation include neighbors, coworkers, fellow church members, etc., who do not properly acknowledge or engage you. I'm referring to individuals that you barely know and never committed an malevolent act against, at least knowingly. Suddenly, what seems clear out of the blue, those same people begin speaking and chatting with you as if nothing is different. At the core, we should always be receptive to good behavior. However, that is not always an easy task. It requires that we subdue our egos and swallow our pride. The ego is the part of the psyche that is rooted in the physical or natural world. Pride is a direct product of ego. The Holy Bible says that Yahweh hates pride.

The more we are in alignment with our Highest-Selves, the less we operate from the ego. 

Honestly, being the recipient of cruelty doesn't make anyone feel good. It definitely lowers the frequency of our vibrations. A common coping mechanism is to allow our hearts to harden and grow cold. It is an effort to avoid emotional pain. Often times, we allow our hearts to grow colder and harden in response to hurtful behavior. We allow the construction of walls around our hearts to shield us from emotional assaults. Ultimately, the heart chakra becomes weak as it loses energy causing spiritual imbalance. I can only imagine the type of coping mechanisms celebrities use to protect themselves from the massive destructive criticism they receive. Some refer to the process as developing a "thick skin." An attempt to adjust to a harsh situation can render a harsh persona. As a result, we not only build a wall against the perpetrators, but people who have absolutely nothing to do with the situation. The world is full of people who have hardened their hearts because they have been hurt...Hurt people hurt people...fact. One is literally going through life alienating actual and potential friends, allies, and supporters. A viscous cycle where many of us have played a role. Thus, hindering one's life's purpose and ultimate ascension. Unfortunately, no one wins in the aftermath.

Psalm 109:3  "With words of hatred they surround me; they attack me without cause."

Here are the most common reasons why a person acts badly towards another without an obvious cause:

Personal Bias/Prejudice 

It can be defined as having a predetermined perception of a person based on external characteristics. Life is not just black and white, but various shades of gray. It is not cool to make sweeping generalizations about people based on a group to which one belongs. It is equivalent to labeling containers without knowing what is inside. There are all types of people and variations within the same group. Prejudiced individuals are dooming their own life's purpose by rejecting people that were meant to serve as allies. One should ideally approach all people on a case-by-case basis and not assume things about them. You never know who you are meant to connect/collaborate with. Your biases/prejudices lower your vibrations manifesting negativity. Hence, you will attract negative people and situations.

Gossip 

James 3:6  "The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole body, sets the whole course of one's life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell."

Another huge factor in how we perceive others is gossip. It can paint an inaccurate/distorted picture of a person that can potentially damage their reputation. It even can interfere with one's goals and progress in particular settings, such as the workplace. Talking about the personal business of others can yield truthful or false information. In actuality, it really does not matter if it is true or false. Gossiping causes the perpetrator to focus on the journey of another when they should be focusing on themselves. It is never wise to gossip about others and it represents small mindedness and spiritual immaturity. On the other hand, you have those who don't actively gossip, but actively listen to it. They internalize what they are hearing as truth and form their perceptions accordingly. As a result, you have people treating others badly solely based on what they heard...no receipts, no firsthand information, no validation. You can end up treating a good person like crap based on lies. Even if the chatter is accurate, you are not their judge or jury. You should be policing your own life/situation, not someone else's. I discuss the dangers of allowing gossip to control how we treat others in the post, Tips For Acting Your Age And Not Your Shoe Size. Focusing on the personal business of another yields no benefits for the gossiper or those listening to it. It disperses negative energy through the spoken word. In turn, the universe will manifest the same. 

Envy/Jealousy

People will treat people badly due to being envious or jealous of them. These individuals are popularly referred to as haters. The target of the hate often has never done anything wrong to the hater. In many cases, the hater was shown kindness and provided support. Surviving Rona is my experience with a mega-hater! Narcissists fall in this category and will try to destroy those they perceive have the desired things they don't have. The reason why they don't have those desired circumstances have nothing to do with the ones they are hating on. However, it has everything to do with their own decisions they made in life. All jealous people are not narcissists, but both groups fail to accept accountability for why they lack in certain areas. They would rather spew hate towards someone who is thriving in those areas. If they are smart, they will be raising their vibrations to manifest the things that they want. Being jealous of someone has the opposite effect. Ascension will never take place while there is envy/jealousy in the heart.

Misinterpretation of Words and/or Actions

Sometimes, people get angry or hurt due to misunderstandings. A word or action has been misinterpreted and someone gets offended. As a result, their demeanor towards you changes. Unfortunately, you have no clue of what has occurred. Consequently, you feel attacked without cause. I experienced a similar situation with a former neighbor. When I first moved to that neighborhood, this person was extremely friendly, always politely greeting me and chatting. Clear out the blue, she and her spouse stopped speaking or saying anything to me. This went on for several years. I was baffled, but I did not waste time worrying about it. One day, she approached me and told me some years prior she was waving hello to me as I was driving out the parking lot. She said I failed to wave back and just "sped off" driving...OMG. I had absolutely no idea of what she was talking about and still don't! I have no memory of seeing her waving at me. I was likely distracted by something else. Also, during that same time period, I had a lot going on in my personal life. She thwarted a potential friendship over being quick to take offense and assume the worse. Although I explained to her it was a misunderstanding, things never were the same between us. This former neighbor is a very outspoken Christian and avid churchgoer...go figure. When I was in church, we read a covenant that said, "Slow to take offense, but always ready for reconciliation." Sadly, a lot of the Christians I know demonstrate the complete opposite.

When people suddenly act friendlier to those they previously mistreated, something has initiated a change of heart. The average adult knows right from wrong and may feel convicted (guilty) by bad behavior. These individuals are more receptive to their Higher-Selves and receiving higher communications. It is the Higher-Self influencing them to adjust their behavior. An old-school term for this phenomenon is "having a conscious." If one's inclination leans more towards the Creator, it will pull them away from negativity. The individuals who go back and forth with their attitudes and behaviors are spiritually unstable. These gullible individuals are the ones who allow gossip/hearsay to determine who they accept or reject. They are often more influenced by peer pressures and outside opinions. Therefore, even if they want to resonate with positivity, even though they know right from wrong, worldly influences will have a bigger impact on their decisions. These people are dominated by the physical realm and primary concern is being a world pleaser. They may converse and laugh with you one day and walk right past you the next! If this dysfunction describes you, then you are mentally and spiritually unstable. You need to choose your side of the fence and stop trying to straddle it. This is the Age of Aquarius and the energy is shifting people to the side to which they truly resonate.

Smiling Faces Show No Traces of What Lurks Within😊

Beware of fake kindness often expressed by those who perceive you can provide them some type of benefit. This scenario often happens when there is a change in your status, for example, winning the lottery$$$💰. Individuals who initially rejected you might instantaneously become notably friendlier. It is not sincere or a true change of heart, but strictly opportunism. Be polite, but limit your interaction with them. Another example is getting a promotion and becoming the boss of your haters. They will suddenly start acting better due to you having authority over them. Once again, their improved behavior is not sincere. Be respectful and treat them fairly, but keep them at a distance.

If you have experienced being the target of the dysfunctional behaviors I am discussing, the most important questions are:  

1. Should you be receptive to their change of heart when they decide to act nice?

-Or-

2. Should you tell them to take a long walk on a short pier over shark infested waters?

Honestly, I actually feel like responding more like #2. My feelings and self-esteem already have been dragged through the mud. Now, I have developed a tough skin and mentally adjusted to your misconduct. Suddenly, you decide you want to act nice and I am suppose to jump up and down for joy? No, you got me twisted! It ain't gonna happen! However, #1 is the appropriate and correct answer. It may be irritating, exasperating, and nerve-wracking, but never discourage anyone from moving in the right direction...even if they are swinging back and forth. You might be the only positive influence they encounter. You might be the only light illuminating whatever darkness surrounds them. At times, it may feel like a blow to your dignity and self-respect, yet be receptive to all positivity no matter the source. The key to life is not about how others act, but how we respond. It is our response that determines our karma and spiritual integrity. The best way to handle the situation is to work on your own spiritual growth. The more spiritually mature one is the greater the ability to tolerate difficult people. This is why ascension is so important. Aligning yourself with higher energetic frequencies will eventually manifest in your life. Those malevolent people will either transform for the good or be removed out of your life. Believe me, I am witnessing it happen every day. The higher I go, the more my environment transforms accordingly. A huge part of the environment are the people in it. Either they transform or they exit. You may ask, "How do they exit?" My answer: A wide variety of ways involving diverse circumstances and situations. How it happens is based on their karma. Either way, they are moved out of my world...physical relocation, illness, and death💀 are the most common ways. Death sounds harsh, but, as I just said their karma dictates their fate. As you transform to your Higher-Self, you will experience the same process. The next time a spiritually unstable person has a spurt of civility towards you, don’t let your pride turn them away. Instead, reach out to them with your spiritual arms, give them a big hug, and say, “Welcome home!”

• Can you think of any other reasons why people mistreat people? 
• Can you think of any other reasons why people suddenly come correct with their behavior? 
• What approach or constructive strategies do you recommend in dealing with difficult people that were not discussed?

ASCEND2TRUTH